Blather on Bicycling

Last weekend Rad Doc and El-train had an experience with Super Spin Instructor. Apparently, during the race this guy turned his knob clockwise 2 full turns many times for a series of interval-like attacks. Unfortunately, the race was just like his spin class and he wasn’t able to roll away from the group. In the end, he turned his knob one too many turns and his class was over. In his words, “That’s just the how I roll.”

Here in the UC, we have a different system of race strategy and preparation. A few of us are racing this weekend in the Chicken Dinner Road Race in Boise. Recently, I shared Bri-Tel’s revolutionary taper technique. I haven’t seen him on a bike for quite some time now, so I get the feeling he is in the lab working on a new formula. In fact, I have confirmation from him that he is NOT riding his bike in preparation for this race. I expect this will mean good results on Sunday. Conversely, Mt. Whits is taking a completely opposite approach by avoiding recovery at all costs. Last time I saw him riding his bike, he was napping on his top tube but somehow was still mixing it in the sprints. I’ll closely monitor this process to see if it has some credibility. El-train is taking yet another distinctive approach. He’s perfecting the art of uncanny timing for mechanical failures. In recent races he’s come through with some clutch chain drops in final sprints and slow tire changes during mid-race punctures. I’ve seen him firsthand out on the roads practicing his chain dropping technique to perfection. I suspect he’s got a new malfunction queued up for this weekend. It is possible this trivium of preparation styles could converge at race time for a trifecta.

I’ve been exploring my own race preparation techniques. Last week I dislocated my shoulder in a crash [getting into my hot tub¹]. As the pain subsided later, I realized that either my nose was broken or I had a bad sinus infection. It certainly had the feel of a broken nose (I would know) and may have happened in the crash. Both the shoulder and the nose were re-aggravations of multiple occurrences of the same injuries. Immediately after these injuries I entered a malaise that had me feeling horrible before and between the races last weekend. I was able to parlay these maladies into 3rd and 10th place finishes with an overall 5th in the omnium. This proves the medicinal power of the bicycle.

My in-race strategy has also been impeccable. In the last race in Boise a couple weeks ago, I threw in 8+ minutes of pedaling backward near the end of the race, at the request of the official. Then, the officials were kind enough to add a 1 something minute penalty after the race. These bonus minutes are a luxury that the other racers haven’t been able to secure. I’m thinking I can tack on some more bonus time this weekend by showing up to the start line late, forcing a bonk by not eating, or throwing in an extra lap. 

What about the other UC guys? Rad Doc has been belting out his regular half-day rides. He’ll probably be tapering for this weekend because he won’t be racing. Likewise, I’m sure the other local racers are feeling too fresh to race this weekend. They’ll probably be out riding solo and putting the smack down on . . . nobody. I’m sure they feel they didn’t quite get the UC technique dialed in this time around, so they’re too embarrassed to race.

—-

Footnotes

¹ omit before publishing.

I’ve heard that since ants can’t see, they smell their way along the trail of the ant in front of them. If you can get the lead ant back on an original path, they’ll keep following each other around in circles. That’s exactly what happened in the Chicken Dinner Race outside Nampa, Idaho today. A long string of ants kept circling around in the desert. I happened to finish as the lead ant in my group.

I always enjoy making the trip over to the tropical paradise of Boise. Before the race people kept talking about a fierce wind out on the course. I’m not sure what they were talking about because I didn’t notice any wind, and once again it was nice to be able to let my knees breath in the balmy weather of Southern Idaho. 

George’s found a very steep and longish climb for a nice racing circuit today. After a few times up the climb, I pulled out my dynamite stick to see if it had any pop. Apparently, the fuse was very short and the stick was big because it scattered our small group. I thought I had Austin dropped but somehow he clawed his way back to me. Our conversation went like on the steepest part of the climb near the top:

A: You are one strong Mr. Falcon [in the Die Hard 2 TV version context]
B: And you’re right here too.
Followed by an exchange of a resssspect pound.

We continued to work together, along with Taylor (his teammate we soon caught), for the last circuit to the finish. I had a good race and finally got to expose my armpits across the finish line. Now we’re set up for a big showdown at the crowning jewel of the series, Emmett-Roubaix. In this race, we will travel from Emmett, Idaho to Roubaix, France. It is a rough course and I have a special bike all rigged up for it. I can’t wait to ride it tomorrow for my training ride.

Lactic Acid teammate Milt also had a free and clear win in the Masters B race and Mike was in 3rd. Congratulations to them. The other UC boys failed to complete the trifecta, but it was a gallant effort. El-train demonstrated his mechanical failure techniques were dialed in with a flat early in the race. Or maybe he just understood my recommendation to go on an early break to mean “early brake” or “mechanical break.” Bri-Tel found out that race prep without a bike doesn’t work so well. I missed the money shot with my camera as they crossed the line together in a Lemond-Hinault-esque overhead joining-of-hands in celebration of last place.

Of the 3 training techniques I outlined in my last entry, it looks like Mt. Whits’ was the superior. He got in a very select group on the first lap and finished in 6th. This is giving further credence to Landis’ philosophy that there is no such thing as “overtraining.” In all seriousness, I’m beginning to subscribe to this philosophy and my personal experience is confirming it. You repeatedly crush yourself until there is no choice but for a positive adaptation by the body. One caveat is that you have to ease up a bit to do speed training and also to freshen up for races.

Next weekend I’ll be racing the Tour of Walla Walla. I’m on a pretty good run now with all top 10 results this year so I’m hoping for the same there. I’ve been packing in a lot of racing this year. I’m thinking about printing some rock band tour T-shirts for myself that have the following on the back:

By the way, I had on some new legs for the race this weekend. Stay tuned for an upcoming entry with pictures to be titled, “Bike P*rn.”

Also, I’ll put up some pictures of today’s race at LaGrandeRide.com later this week.